Conflict is When you Hone Your Leadership Skills not your Escalation Tactics

Conflict is everywhere and is a staple in every team. I would be surprised if conflict does not exist in a team as I have yet to see a conflict-free environment.

What do we do when faced with conflicts within the team?

This is the time when leadership qualities shine regardless of position and see it as an opportunity to grow not as an obstacle or roadblock that needs to be escalated right away.

What are the skills we can grow out of the conflict?

Analysis – We have to analyze the situation and understand where members of the team are coming from. Ask yourself how come issues have risen and try to ask people back and see how they think.

Communication – By seeking more information we are able to improve our communication skills as we learn how to ask the right questions without being arrogant and at the same time learn how to explain ourselves to clarify our position and understanding.

Patience – During a time of conflict, people’s patience are short that they want resolution right away. This is not always the case, it takes time to come up with something and all team members meeting somewhere.

Sales – As our understanding and perspectives are heard, we begin to have an answer to the conflict which has to be communicated and understood by everyone. This is the time you sell your answer to everyone in the hope of accepting your solution.

Negotiation – Not everyone will buy in your perspective but as long as some people would like the idea, then negotiation starts in the hope of winning some of your arguments and finish off by compromising things for the benefit of everyone.

I am pissed off whenever a staff simply send you an email or talk directly about a problem or conflict within a team which was not discussed and resolved amongst themselves. The first thing I would do is to ask the person whether they took steps to discuss the issue and resolve it by themselves.

If yes, I would ask about the results whether it was something the members have agreed on or whether they had different options (I’ll get the list of options they came up with) that needs to be decided at a higher level.

If no, then I’d tell them to discuss it amongst themselves first and present to me resolution, suggestions, options, etc.

I understand there are people who don’t have the courage to discuss the conflict with the members and this is the time I assess whether it is too sensitive or it is just plain weakness of a person. I would normally encourage the person to strengthen his character to take the necessary steps to resolve the conflict which will greatly benefit the person’s leadership growth.

I have worked with so many people escalating right away just because they do not want to compromise or cannot win in arguments. I feel sorry for them because escalation can only carry you within the company ranks but would not build you into a leader who can win outside your company.

Escalation doesn’t exist when closing deals with customer or clients against super power businesses and proposals. What you need are high-end skills similar to what you can hone when dealing and resolving conflicts. Think like a leader and not as a puppet indulging yourself in politics within the company ranks. Those people who are fond of escalation are people I have left in their rotten organization as I move to bigger and greater companies carrying with me multitudes of high-end skills.

So there goes the cycle…