Don’t Let Molehills Become Mountains

Have you ever obsessed about something to the point where it took on a life of its own?  Where a small irritant became bigger than life?  When that one irritant consumed a disproportionate amount of your time?

When this happens within a team environment, it can destroy your individual productivity and motivation, as well as poison the relationships within the team.  Ultimately, the whole team will suffer.

Since it is inevitable that irritants will arise when working closely with others, how can you guard against the “mountain out of a molehill” scenario?

The first thing to do is identify the source of irritation or disagreement.  It could be a difference of opinion, a habit of someone that you find annoying, or a thoughtless comment that you just can’t seem to shake off.  If it’s something that you just can’t seem to get out of your mind, then it’s something that needs to be addressed, and the earlier it is recognized and addressed, the easier it will be to resolve.

How do you move to resolution once you’ve identified the source?

Stay (or become) calm:  When tempers are running amok, it’s impossible to have a meaningful conversation.  When backs are to the wall, there is no room for resolution.  So take a break if you need to. Agree to discuss the matter later, if that buys everyone time to calm down.  Just get your head and your emotions in a place where you can address the issue.

Make it all about business:  Keep your focus on the dispute.  Veering off into the personal may be a sign that you’re in angry mode, rather than calm mode.  If necessary, take a break and start over when you can focus on the business end of things.

Identify and echo the other person’s position:  You already know what you think, so by articulating the other position you gain clarification, and perhaps insight, on the subject.  There may be rationale and concerns that you didn’t think of.  Awareness of both will help you create a win-win solution.

Closure:  Eventually you just have to move on.  If it’s necessary to agree to disagree, then fine, that’s a resolution.  Even better, though, is to find a solution that meets the needs and concerns of both parties.  It’s always best when both parties can take ownership of the solution and its implementation.  Don’t forget, sometimes the best resolution is a sincere apology.

You may not be able to head off all irritants and disagreements within your team, but armed with these leadership techniques, you’ll be better able to turn the situation around.

What other techniques have worked for you?