The truth about lying
Do you wonder what’s happened to people over the last century and into this one? What changed?
When did fudging, lying, dissembling, dissimulating, equivocating, falsifying, fibbing, inventing, misleading, misrepresenting, misstating, and prevaricating, become business as usual?
Leaders, followers, parents, kids; religious or not; whether business or personal, we all do it.
We lie to avoid confrontation; improve results; sidestep repercussions.
We lie to our friends, parents, kids, congregations, clergy people, bosses, workers, colleagues and service providers.
From why something/someone is late to income tax to stock option backdating/corporate results to campaign promises—the list is both endless and all encompassing.
Most of us don’t see ourselves as liars, usually because there are “valid reasons” for it.
But, sad to say, Plato’s words ring as true today as when he spoke them,
“False words are not only evil in themselves, but they infect the soul with evil.”
When did you last lie or fudge the truth?
What triggers you to do it?
Your comments—priceless
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POSTED IN: About Leadership, Communication, Ethics, Personal Development
7 opinions for The truth about lying
MAPping Company Success
Mar 17, 2008 at 7:27 pm
[...] A few days ago, I was talking about lying over at Leadership Turn. [...]
Denis
Mar 18, 2008 at 8:40 am
Do you realize that the whole education process is based on little ‘lies’ ?
To me, in terms of morals, there is a difference between preparing the presentation of things and falsifying. The intent is different.
I am afraid that many people who falsify things are not even aware of what they are doing (in particular some corporate spinners) because they work with a very partial and limited knowledge themselves. Of course this does not apply to all cases (say the Bush administration for instance).
It is also the case that as long as you don’t profit from your lie from a victim, it is not legally wrong. I wonder if there could be grounds for class actions when corporate executives lie.
Miki Saxon
Mar 18, 2008 at 9:14 am
Denis, I don’t argue with what you say, but I do argue for awareness.
Often, the reason behind the lie is more important than the lie itself. And the normal “for their own good” is the worst, since it’s used to excuse everything.
Being legally right can still be morally reprehensible, but it’s all still situational within the the context of the mores of the times.
And it’s a two-bottles-of-wine discussion where best case analysis crosses the line to lying.
In my other blog (see link above) I point out that the public apologies we hear for all the wrongs would be far more honest if they were apologizing for getting caught as opposed to the original action.
Denis
Mar 18, 2008 at 11:04 am
Interestingly there is something cultural in this exercise.
It struck me when I first came in the US to see this exercise of public apology as I saw it as blatantly phony. I had never witnessed it anywhere else.
Now I know these guys simply abuse the generally trusting and short memoried american public (especially the one between the coasts :o) ). Unfortunately the practice is spreading around the world (except in Russia…) as short memory is (or is it short attention span ?).
Miki Saxon
Mar 18, 2008 at 11:38 am
Well, it’s common practice in Japan and Korea, but the big difference to me is that those guys usually resign—but that’s probably because their culture requires it.
And have you noticed that when the apology is given some kind of religious context it’s suddenly unassailable no matter the offense? Lie, cheat, steal, murder—all is forgiven if you get religion.
Stokes
Jun 24, 2009 at 7:35 pm
Lies are entertaining. Drama would be rather weak without
embellishment. How about the “Once upon a time…
tales? What about negotiating the shoals of
classroom/workplace power dynamics? One can
“speak truth to power”and then speak truth in
the unemployment line. Once one gets a certain
age it is easy to distinguish which words are evil.
Miki Saxon
Jun 24, 2009 at 8:10 pm
Hi Stokes, if it was that easy to distinguish evil the lies of Wall Street wouldn’t have landed us where we are. The more one lies the easier it becomes and the less it seems like a lie, rather it’s a matter of convenience.
Thanks for visiting and offering a different viewpoint!
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